By Lucy McKindlay
The Big Fish in a Small Pond One
- Duxed their high school.
- Has done every extra-curricular known to man.
- Thinks a high ATAR will translate into good law marks.
- Actually just super burned out and really should have taken a gap year.
The Hungover One
- Is at Moose religiously every Thursday night (most Fridays and Saturdays too).
- Has a much less consistent record for attending lectures.
- Always cops the 10% tutorial participation mark.
- You would be forgiven for forgetting they take the course entirely, until you see them emerge across the room for the final exam. You might even be lucky enough to catch them at the graduation ceremony, but only because it’s an opportunity to go for a well-deserved drink afterwards.
The Over-Achieving One
- Is so excited and so happy to be here.
- It is their passion to be a human rights lawyer and to work for the UN.
- Is always on top of all their readings and says that they are really enjoying their subjects.
- Catchphrase: “Law is a challenge, but that’s a good thing!”
- (Is actually dying inside).
The Daley Road One
- Often seen wearing puffer jackets and RMs, despite the fact they come from Sydney or Melbourne and haven’t been on a farm in their life.
- Usually turns up to tutorials with their posse of college mates, yet looks bewildered and out of place in that one elective where there are only townies to talk to.
- Already has their clerkship confirmed and probably a place in a top tier law firm.
- Is really just riding out the degree to get the piece of paper at the end.
The Creative One
- Does a visual arts degree with a side of law.
- Only does law to appease the family, but really does not care at all about fiduciary duties or corporate contracting… this is probably a good thing, because they have no idea what is going on 90% of the time.
- Does no work but somehow manages to manipulate that creative genius and get decent marks.
- Always turns up to class 20 minutes late but looks edgy enough to never be called up for it.
The Arrogant One
- Without fail, always claims they have barely studied for their exam and didn’t start their assignment until the last minute. (Has actually been working hard for months.)
- Always says they are disappointed with their marks, yet after you reveal your (actually) low grade, they reveal they received a measly 88.
- Enthusiastically congratulates you on your shitty mark despite this significant gap.